I want to welcome A. Reed another survivor speaking out about her story of abuse. She is courageously sharing in order to help others. Thank you so much A. for sharing your story. She has a blog at :
I was verbally abused by my mother. She said horrible and mean things to be. She told me that I should have been a blow job, she wished she had of aborted me when she considered it. She told me I was ugly, worthless and God was going to destroy me(She was and still is a Jehovah’s Witness).
I was molested by her brother(My Uncle) and she still doesn’t believe me. My father, however does, and I pray that man finds a jail cell before my father finds him.
My brother molested me, and he’s rotting in jail because he raped another girl. It’s a very sick and twisted story that I don’t want to go into. I don’t hate him for what he did to me, but I do hate him for what he did to our father. My dad stood up for him, and ended up writing him a four page letter describing the act in detail.
My father was the one who put my brother in prison. He never knew of my story,and I’m glad I never told him
because if I had, my brother would be dead, and my father in prison.
My mother was abused as a child, and I can tell because she was diagnosed with Dementia. She does things now, that make me wonder if she was in her beginning stages when I was a teen, and, were those awful things said to her when she was my age. I forgive her because she is my mother, and if it wasn’t for her I wouldn’t have my babies. How could I hold hate in my heart for someone who brought me into this world? Even better, who gave me the ability to have my beautiful daughters?
The few times my father caught her saying these things to me, he put a stop to it. A lot of it however went unknown.I never told him even close to the whole story, and I never will. He’s losing my mother, and that hurts enough. To hear his wife did those mean horrible things to his daughter, would probably kill him from the stress. He already has health issues, I’m not going to give him anymore.
I was raped by someone I thought was a friend on July 18th, 2009. It almost destroyed my relationship with my husband now. My husband however, knows me like the back of his hand, has always known me that well. He knew I wasn’t lying. My rapist actually tried to make contact with me in October of that year. I’ve never saw my husband angrier.It was frightening. He held no anger towards me, but the calm rage he had towards that man, coming from another man usually quiet and humble. His words.. well.. I won’t say. Just to put it kindly, his ability to have children would be gone if my husband had his way.
I for a long time battled depression. I cut, burned, and damn near didn’t survive a suicide attempt. My husband caught me and saved my life. He said my arm belonged to him now, and I couldn’t do that. My sarcastic response was, “Your name’s not on it!” Well, now it is. I always said I would never tattoo a man’s name on my arm, but he’s the father of my children and he saved my life. Whether we make it forever or not(knock on wood), I’ll love him forever and always for that. But if we’ve made it through all this, then we can and will make it through anything.
My father, My husband and most of all my children are my drive to survive, and push forward. I have beaten depression and I’m now a happy-go-lucky person. My daughters need a strong and happy mommy, not a depressed darkened one. To all of you going through hell, I know where you are and, I also know it will be okay. You are strong. You are amazing and you will survive.
There is hope!