Save a home
I want to welcome one of my friends from the wonderful world of blogging Merry. Merry is from over at http://knockedoverbyafeather.wordpress.com She did a blog post recently that broke my heart. A small part of the reason I felt her pain is that I’ve been there on more than one occasion, and any help that I got was both a gift and painful at the same time. I welcome Merry to share her story. The link to help is at the bottom.
Hi. Some of you know me from WordPress. I started blogging in October of 2012 because my therapist at the time thought it would be a good idea for me to write about my struggle with depression. I named it Knocked over by a Feather, which had come from a comment made by my husband. We had just gotten married a short time earlier, on September 26, 2009. Life was starting to look up, and we bought a condo that Christmas. Then things came crashing down.
Christmas before crash
In the summer of 2011, I started having a difficult time keeping up with my job, my relationships and basically just life in general. I came very close to committing suicide. I ended up having to go to the hospital for outpatient therapy for two months. I had thought that my life would finally just pick up where it left off once I was done with my treatment.
I did work for a while, but after three months, I crumbled under the weight of my new responsibilities. I should have taken it slower, maybe, but this particular job was a management position. I was told that I would be properly trained to handle it. This did not happen, forcing me to quit, because I was so stressed out that I was starting to get sick in the mornings. I continued to try to find a job, but if I landed the interview, when the day came to actually go, I would have an anxiety attack. I felt completely immobilized by fear.
I decided that my mental issues ran deeper than I had originally thought, so I applied for disability in September of 2012. It was a hard decision to make, realizing that I was unable to handle any kind of stress without cracking.
I was also starting to have more symptoms of my fibromyalgia, that had been diagnosed in 1998. Up until that time, it had been very mild/moderate and I was still able to work full-time, physical labor jobs.
Fibro is a chronic pain syndrome that affects many different systems of the body. It causes widespread pain, weakness, cognitive issues, fatigue..the list goes on….It can be debilitating and effects 5% of the population. My doctor has no answers. There really is no way to know exactly why it decided to amp up, although he did say that my depression could have been traumatic enough to trigger a worsening of the symptoms. It could also just be that I am getting older. I take it day by day, trying to accept my limitations. I write about it often on my blog, and I usually spare no detail.Fibromyalgia is a nasty little bastard, and sadly there are many of us out there.
I was denied disability, then attained some lawyers to assist me. They sent me to their doctors, and to my shock I completely failed the physical test. My legs were so weak and painful, I couldn’t even lift them more than a few inches off the exam table.
Trying to dig out of the financial hole these last few years has been a constant struggle. I had posted here about my husband and I finally giving up the fight to save our home from being auctioned off for back taxes. So when Zoe asked me if it would be okay if she started a fundraiser for me on her blog, I was both hesitant and awestruck. I had been asked by another blogger just the previous day if he could be of assistance, but I declined. ( I wanted to say yes, DJ.) His blog can be found here.
It really is difficult to explain the different kind of emotions that I am experiencing at the moment. I feel truly blessed to have so much support from my family and friends, who pick me up when I am down. They remind me that I am a fighter, and always have been.
I am a fibro warrior.
What is really boils down to is that Zoe reached her hand out, and I allowed myself to reach back. DJ paved the way. Thank you both from the bottom of my heart.
I have set up a site to help raise funds for Merry and her family. No one should have to lose their home. If you can help at all we would appreciate it beyond words. No amount is too small. Here is the link to the site that’s been set up to help.
We also ask you all to pass this along to others. Reblog or do a post of your own. We can do this together as a community!
Thank you in advance!
There is hope!